The Scottish Word:


“Hoi what’s that guff – huv ye scowdered ma toast interferin wi that machine again?”


scowder: burn, over-toast.

“Hey what’s that smell – have you burnt my toast interfering with that machine again?”

[scowder spelled out in the phonetic alphabet.]

Illustration Friday. expired

As a young bachelor with my first flat I inherited an old bakelite toaster from my work coffee area which I fixed.

I swear it was 25 years old at least before my wife made me give it up.

And only because it was beginning to really look its age. It still worked and when it didn’t it was fixable.

No parts had been replaced or worn out unlike the replacement toaster which failed three weeks after the one year warranty ran out.

Two slots work but the other two refuse to stay down. Unfixable unless one is an electronics expert.

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