Wife with porridge box and paste box expaining her husband's lumpy badly done wallpapering.
The Scottish Word:

Parritch.

I think it’s lumpy because you’ve used the parritch mix instead o the wallpaper paste mix dear.

Nae wonder the rat’s eating it.

Ahn tae mak it warse ye’ve used ma insta-mix special extra lumpy hip bath parritch that we sweem in at the Auchenshuggle spa ahn tan club.

Did ye ken that we do a side line in building biodegradable coffins frae slabs o it as well.

They’re verra popular in Scotland ye ken.

Achenshuggle Porridge Box.

 

 

Translated:

parritch, parridge: porridge.

I think it’s lumpy because you have used the porridge mix instead of the wallpaper paste mix dear.

No wonder the rat’s eating it.

And to make matters worse you have used my insta-mix special extra lumpy hip bath porridge that we swim in at the Auchensguggle spa and tanning club.

Did you know that we also do a side line in building biodegradable coffins from slabs of it as well.

They’re very popular in Scotland you know.

ˈpariʤ

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