I think it’s lumpy because you’ve used the parritch mix instead o the wallpaper paste mix dear. Nae wonder the rat’s eating it. Ahn tae mak it warse ye’ve used ma insta-mix special extra lumpy hip … Continue reading Parritch.
Hoi! It’s no ma faut folk are biggin canal bridges oot o glaiss. Ahn wha decided you should be the arbiter of what a quine sees or disni see onywye? Are you the boss o her? … Continue reading Faut
“Toast nivir lands butter side doon as afen as is thocht. An if it does, it’s a sure sign there’s attery oot an aboot that shouldni. That’s why I built this universal attery detector.” Translated: attery: … Continue reading Attery
"Ah ken, but it’s the thoucht that coonts, ma wee pal." Translated: coont, cwint: add up, count. "I know, but it’s the thought that counts, my small new acquaintance and friend." kunt gesture. It’s three weeks … Continue reading Coont
"Hmmmm this is swack n tasty." Translated: swack: moist and soft, easily mouldable; of cheese. "Hmmmm this is moist, soft and tasty." swak
“Mither! Faither! I’ve sorted oot the mortgage arrears – I bocht the bank. Hello. Hellooo…” Translated: bocht: bought. “Mother! Father! I have sorted out the mortgage arrears – I went and bought the bank. Hello. Hellooo…” … Continue reading Bocht
“We’ve got the teeth in common – could ye no see me goin intae widdland management – same as you – on a sma scale like.” Translated: widd: wood. “We have got the teeth in common … Continue reading Widd
“Ach this jar’s fair toom an nae mistake.” Translated: toom: empty. “Dear me, this jar’s rather empty and no mistake.”
“Jings, her wisker wis fair fu the-day.” Translated: wisker: belt with padded section full of holes to hold knitting needles; a bunch of straw folded over neatly, bound tightly and tucked in the apron to hold … Continue reading Wiskir
“Ah’ve telt ye a hunner times, nicky-tams is for keepin’ rambunctious rats oot – no in!” Translated: nicky-tams: string tied around the leg below the knee to keep trouser leg bottoms out of the mud. “I … Continue reading Nicky-tams