futuristic sailing boat about to be sunk by a giant rising bubble from the corrupted sea floor.
The Scottish Word:


The alairm’s aff, whaur’s yer KULF! Hiv ye no been telt it’s a maun-be fur them that sail in oor modern oceans.

If ye dinni huv yer ‘Keepie Up Life Float’ (KULF tae you) yer likely tae be swallied by yin o them reglar muckle pushionous bummels that rise oot o oor rotten sea beds.

If one burstens square unner oor boat the hail jing-bang draps doon intae the void as the sea claps shut on its doom.

You too if yer no floating wi yer KULF.


maun-be: an unavoidable necessity, compulsion.

The alarm is sounding, where’s your KULF! Have you not been told that it’s a necessity for us who sail in our modern oceans.

If you do not have your ‘Keeping one Uplifted Life Float’ (KULF to you) your likely to be swallowed by one of many regular giant poisonous bubbles that rise out of our rotten sea beds.

If one bursts square under our boat the whole caboodle drops down into the void as the sea claps shut on its doom.

You too if you are not floating with your KULF.

mɑ:n bi
The Scottish Word: maun-be with its definition and its meaning illustrated and captioned with the word used in context in the Scots language and in English.

The Future.

This fictional future in which our sailor exists is where he has to buy his own KULF, his other safety equipment, his boots, clothes, food and water and is allowed to do so only from the company shop. And he pays for his days off. Even Sundays. There is no religion.

If he has no money the company will give him a loan. Plus interest.

But all this is real history as well. Many companies in the recent past operated like this. Legally.

Particularly the big coal mining companies in the USA and mill owners in the UK.


Rich people have never played Jenga and been allowed to lose.

In their unthinking part of their brain they imagine if they just squeeze the final bit of profit from the environment and go away, it will recover in time. And the discomfort of others is a small price to pay.

It won’t affect us anyway. They imagine.

If you are looking at the world around you then you should know this is no longer true.

Never was.

Present Day.

I’m old enough to tell you that had my great grandfather lived on the coast of Scotland with his rowboat he could easily have filled a barrel with enough fish to make a living at the market.

Any hobby fisherman today in a similar boat on the same coast is lucky to catch two small fish in a week.

The trouble is we become accustomed and comfortable with our present environment. Oblivious of how it used to be. Just like a frog in water that’s steadily heading towards boiling point.

It’s a shame rich men don’t stop and think from time to time.

World Ocean Day.

It’s world ocean day today and they are in a bad way.

Just look at whales alone. At how they used to be so ridiculously plentiful in the days when Moby Dick was written.

The ruins left from that massive industrial slaughter can still be viewed today.

Ruins: even in Scotland.

Do something: World Oceans Day. Find an event.

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